Whoever said, “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” didn’t know what they were talking about! The truth is that our words can make or break our relationships and we need to commit to using our words wisely. Never say the following…
There is some bad marriage advice out there. We don’t know where some of these got started, but they are WAY off the mark.
Below are ten simple things that will bless your marriage. Let us know what you think!
We laughed recently when we heard a woman say, “If my husband ever says there is no spark in our relationship, I’m going to taz him. Then when he wakes up, I’ll ask him if he still feels that way.” That’s not the way to bring a spark back into your relationship, but here are 10 good ways (and much less painful 😜)…
A month or so ago, a lady saw Lea and I being affectionate with one another while waiting in line at a
restaurant. She asked, “Are you guys honeymooners?” That made me feel great as I thought, “YES, people notice that we’re
practicing what we’re preaching on this marriage stuff…”
THEN … this past week the opposite happens. Lea and I were working down at her little store. While I was helping her hang a few items on a wall, she was supposed to hold a spot I’d marked on the wall for the nail to go. Before I was ready, she moved her finger and lost the spot …
ME (A little frustrated and with a little bit of tone): Why did you move your finger?!?!
HER: I’m so sorry. I guess my brain just went on hold for a second.
ME (Still sounding a bit frustrated): Okay, I guess we can start all the way over … again.
(At that moment a lady in the store that knows exactly who we are, and has overheard our conversation and my tone, pipes up and says … )
LADY: Hey, I know this really good marriage workshop you guys should try to attend. It would probably help (she says with a teasing smile).
Busted. Yip, I’ve still got work to do. And yes, pride goes before a fall.
We are schedule people. We schedule important things like doctor’s appointments, workouts at the gym and activities
for your kids. So why not schedule sex into your calendar? Some may say when it comes to scheduling sex, “Sex should be
spontaneous,” or “Scheduling intimacy will take the romance out of it.” But the truth is, scheduling sex between you and your
spouse may be one of the most brilliant decision you can make for your relationship. Here are 4 good reasons to consider
scheduling sex into your calendar …
1. IF IT ISN’T SCHEDULED, IT MAY NOT HAPPEN: The reason we use a calendars is to carve out time for the things that matter. Sex in your marriage relationship matters very much, so marking a time for it among the other important parts of your life is not only wise, but it will go a long way toward ensuring that the intimacy actually happens.
2. IT GETS YOU IN THE MOOD: When lovemaking is scheduled and kept on the front-burner, it builds anticipation, and both husband and wife begin to prepare physically, emotionally and mentally for it.
3. HONESTLY, ADMIT IT, IT STRENGTHENS YOUR RELATIONSHIP: Sex isn’t what defines the marriage, but it’s an extremely important part of it. Sex will not fix a bad marriage, but no sex will probably damage a good one. Don’t underestimate the importance of a healthy sex life in your marriage.
4. IT ELIMINATES “THE ASK”: In most marriages, one partner possesses a higher desire than the other and requests sex more often, while his or her partner rarely asks for physical intimacy. For the spouse with a higher desire, the fear of rejection often sets in. One becomes weary of having to ask, or even beg, for sex on a regular basis. When a couple can agree upon a basic schedule for sex in marriage, it takes the guesswork out. While this still leaves room for occasional spontaneity, it reassures the higher-sex-drive mate that it will happen, and not only that—they know when! Usually the schedule is less often than the partner with a higher desire would want and more frequent than the partner with a lesser desire may want. Instead, it’s meeting on middle ground.
5. IT PROVIDES AN INCENTIVE TO GET THE KIDS TO BED EARLY. Bedtime can be a bit of a war zone when you have little ones. If you have multiple little ones, getting them all down at night can be much like a game of wack-a-mole, once you get one down, the other pops up. BUT you’re willing power through just to have some one-on-one time and intimacy together. It’s worth it.
We don’t believe anyone ever goes looking to have an affair. Instead, affairs happen over time when we let our
guard down and quit focusing on our marriages. One of the best things you can do to keep your marriage strong is to pay attention
to the signs that your relationship is headed in the wrong direction. So here are ten early warning signs someone may be headed
for an affair…
1) If you have an “It’ll never happen to us” attitude. Don’t EVER let your guard down.
2) If you confide in someone of the opposite sex about your marriage problems.
3) If you neglect your marriage and no longer try to meet your spouse’s needs.
4) If you are not doing regular check-ups with your spouse asking, “How are we doing?”
5) If you are not being proactive in the growth of your marriage.
6) If you focus all your energy and attention on your children and not your marriage.
7) If you are locking your phone from your spouse, or deleting texts or Facebook messages so your spouse won’t see them.
8) If you only dress down when your spouse is around, and never up.
9) If you are keeping secrets or hiding things from your spouse about a friendship you have with someone of the opposite sex.
10) If there has been a huge drop off in intimacy or none at all.