31 Days of Wisdom for Your Marriage (January)
Each day we are going to be posting thoughts from our book, Wisdom for your Marriage, and the book of Proverbs. Join us here for that.
January 16th – PROVERBS 16
“Stalemates Are Deadly”
VERSES WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 16 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verses 3, 5-6, 11, 13, 18-19, 21, 24-25, 32.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THOSE VERSES WE UNDERLINED: Commit to the Lord whatever you do … when you are serving your spouse, and others, you are putting God first. God loves honesty. PRIDE – the main theme of the chapter – will kill our marriages and relationships. Gracious words speak life (see chapter 15).
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Stalemates are deadly to your marriage. When you get to the point you quit, because pride has entered into the marriage, things go downhill quickly. Pride is a killer … a marriage killer, a relationships killer, a family killer and a faith killer. Verse 5 teaches us that God will punish the prideful. Question #2 was also good for us and our discussion: “How can you intentionally get wisdom and insight?”
January 15th – PROVERBS 15
“Speak Life”
VERSES WE UNDERLINED IN PROVERBS 15 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verses 1-2 were the main points. Also 4, 6, 8-9, 25, 28, 30.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THOSE VERSES WE UNDERLINED: Our words have the ability to build up or destroy … to heal or to kill. Use them wisely in all your relationships.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Trey learned in this chapter that sometimes pride goes before a fall. đ Our words and our tone are so important in our relationships. It’s been said that 10% of conflicts in your marriage are due to a difference in opinion, AND 90% are due to using the wrong tone of voice. It is essential that we watch our tone. Also we learned there are phrases we can use to speak life into our marriage and children. The discussion questions in this chapter were fantastic.
January 14th – CHAPTER 14
“Don’t be a Hot-Head”
VERSES WE UNDERLINED IN PROVERBS 14 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verses 1, 3, 8, 11, 15, 16-17, 26-27, 29-30 were all amazing verses that popped off the page.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THOSE VERSES WE UNDERLINED: Anger and pride tear down relationships. Watch your mouth. Think before you act and speak. Verse 30 says, “A heart at peace gives life to the body.” Anger and pride don’t bring peace … or life.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Three of the biggest marriage killers all start with the letter “A” … Affairs, Anger and Addictions. This chapter taught us about anger and having a short fuse. Neither of those things promote wisdom or healthy relationships. Also DON’T MISS: “Anger isn’t in your genes; it’s a learned trait. IF you have a short temper, you probably learned it from your parents or someone else. The really sad thing is that if you don’t get it under control, your children will learn it from you, and you will be hurting their future relationships. Get it under control.”
January 13th – CHAPTER 13
“Leave an Inheritance”
VERSES WE UNDERLINED IN PROVERBS 13 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: This chapter of Proverbs was full of great verses about life, wisdom, and leaving an inheritance. Of course, we focused on verse 22.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THOSE VERSES IN PROVERBS: The most valuable thing we can leave our kids is a legacy of faith and how to do life and marriage. Did you catch the statement, “You may not have come from a healthy family, but you can make sure a healthy family comes from you?” Your marriage can affect generations.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Children want and need parents to invest in their marriage. A healthy marriage gives kids peace and security. Your children are learning about faith, family, and marriage from you. Teach them well. When you work together to strengthen your marriage, not only does your marriage improve, you benefit future generations. Youâre creating a healthy legacy and a rich inheritance. Your children, their children, and their childrenâs children will be strengthened by your strong faith, family, and marriage!
January 12th – CHAPTER 12
“Don’t Be Stupid”
VERSES WE UNDERLINED IN PROVERBS 12 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verse 1, 3, 14, 15 and 26.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THOSE VERSES IN PROVERBS: Calling someone stupid isn’t very politically correct today, but verse one tells us if you don’t like correction, you are stupid. Wow, God doesn’t play around. That’s how important learning, wisdom, and discipline are.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Instead of being stupid, be …
- The one with noble character (vs. 4)
- The one who is not a pretender (vs. 9)
- The one who is kind (vs. 10)
- The one who isnât afraid to work (vs. 11, 14, 24, 27)
- The one who uses their words for good (vs. 14)
- The one who listens to advice (vs. 15)
- The one who is truthful (vs. 17)
- The one who uses their tongue for healing (vs. 18)
- The one who promotes peace (vs. 20)
- The one who is trustworthy (vs. 22)
- The one who will share a kind word (vs. 25)
- The one who chooses their friends carefully (vs. 26)
Also, discussion question three was SO good. If we can just learn to control our tongue, wisdom will come much easier. We read the passage in James on controlling the tongue, and found it very interesting that immediately following that is a section of scripture on WISDOM!
JANUARY 11th – CHAPTER 11
“Keep the Main Thing the Main Thing”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN PROVERBS CHAPTER 11 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verse 3, 5-6, 8, 10-11, 19 … all verses that deal with how living a righteous and wise life will bless you.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THIS CHAPTER OF PROVERBS: Today verse 30 stood out to us, “The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, and the one who is wise saves lives.” When we are wise and live life God’s way, our lives bring life to others around us. Our fruit produces life in our children and others who know us. Our goal is to bring life to others, not death. Lead them well.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: We loved the story of Mr. Fulton. Live life in such a way that when your life ends, you’ve been successful in things that really mattered. Love God, love your spouse and children. Relationships are always greater than fame, success, education, careers, and material things.
JANUARY 10th – CHAPTER 10
“Love Covers All Wrongs”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN PROVERBS CHAPTER 10 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Definitely verse 12, but also verse 29 was SO, SO good.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THIS CHAPTER: We need to be better forgivers and stop holding things against one another. We know we will make mistakes (verse 12), but our love for one another should cover those mistakes.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: 1) Forgive when your spouse apologizes. 2) Forgive before they have a chance to apologize, and 3) Forgive them even if they don’t apologize. Everyday God treats us better than we deserve … and He expects us to do the same to our spouse and others.
January 9th – CHAPTER 9
“Correct Me If I’m Wrong”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN THIS CHAPTER THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Besides verses 7-9, we also underlined verses 1-6 because we’re reminded of all that Wisdom offers.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER: Wisdom has so much to offer in the first six verses, and ignoring Her costs so much verses 7-9.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Don’t just shrug off every negative comment as unwarranted criticism. Sometimes criticism is warranted, and you need to ask yourself, “Are they telling the truth?” Don’t let pride keep you from learning. No one likes to be corrected, but wise people continue to learn.
January 8th – CHAPTER 8
“Treasure Hunting”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN THIS CHAPTER THAT STOOD OUT TO US: We specifically noticed verses 10,11, 18-21. Those verses taught us about what we should make a priority in our lives on this earth.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM PROVERBS 8: Treasure and riches aren’t bigger houses, better jobs or nicer cars. Instead, treasures and riches are wisdom and doing things right in this world. Wisdom is a treasure to seek and search for, and if you find it, you have success.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Despite being worth more than gold or silver, wisdom is out there and not hard to find. Wisdom is doing life, marriage and everything in between, God’s way. When you do things God’s way, life simply is better. Many people have misconceptions that God’s rules keep them from having any fun. On the contrary, He gives us rules because he knows what is best for us, and He actually wants us to have life to the fullest.
January 7th – CHAPTER 7
“Don’t Be Brainless”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN THIS CHAPTER THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Wow, what a powerful chapter of Proverbs. We’re taught so much here. We pretty much underlined the ENTIRE chapter. We learned so much.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM PROVERBS 7:
- Temptation often takes place after dark. (Verse 9)
- Temptation looks appealing. (Verse 10)
- Temptation will overcome anyone who is willing. (Verse 11)
- Temptation is everywhere. (Verse 12)
- Temptation is aggressive. (Verse 13)
- Temptation will try to make you feel that God is okay with it. She has come from worship where she has made sacrifices. (Verse 14)
- Temptation will make you think youâre special. (Verse 15-18)
- Temptation will make you feel secure that you wonât get caught. (Verse 19-20)
- Temptation is persuasive. (Verse 21)
- Temptation will cost you your LIFE. (Verse 22-23)
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER IN THE BOOK: Temptation is everywhere. It literally stalks you. Be on guard against it at all times. Temptation promises you EVERYTHING you ever wanted, but all it really brings is death and the grave. From the beginning of the chapter in the book to the very end … we needed this reminder. Beware of the one who wants to pull you away from your spouse. It can happen to anyone.
IF you haven’t ordered your book, you can get it by clicking here.
January 6th – CHAPTER 6
“Laziness is a Marriage Killer”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 6 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verse 22-23 were amazing. “Bind them always on your heart; fasten them around your neck. 22 When you walk, they will guide you; when you sleep, they will watch over you; when you awake, they will speak to you.”
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE CHAPTER: Wisdom will guide you … day, night … all the time.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM DOING THE BOOK TODAY: Marriage doesn’t kill romance, laziness does. When we first get married, we do so many things to bless our spouse. If we’re not careful, over time, we just get by trying to do the minimum.
January 5th – CHAPTER 5
“Drunk On Love”
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 5 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verse 3 is so good at teaching us about how temptation works. Also verse 8-13 teaches us HOW and WHY to avoid temptation in our marriage.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM CHAPTER 5: Verse 3 taught us that temptation is good at selling herself as something you want and need in your life. She’s a sweet talker who will tell you it will ALL BE OKAY, but in the end, it will cost you your life.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM DOING THE BOOK TODAY: WOW, we enjoyed the book today. We learned …
* Your marriage isn’t something you upgrade like a cellphone.
* Temptation is real and WILL seek to destroy your marriage. Be on guard.
* That married sex is referred to as as a cistern and running well, which means it is life-giving to your marriage and constantly refreshing.
* It’s okay to be intoxicated with the love you and your spouse make.
IF you haven’t ordered your book, you can get it by clicking here.
January 4th – CHAPTER 4
“Guard Your Heart”
REMINDER: We’re putting pictures of our notes from our book on our story on both Instagram and Facebook.
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 4 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verses 5-9 are so good. Specifically verse 7, “The beginning of wisdom is this: Get Wisdom.”
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM PROVERBS 4: Verse 23 stands out with the first three words, “Above all else,” meaning this is the most important thing of ALL … “guard your heart.” You have control over your heart. You are the gatekeeper of the door, and you MUST stand strong not to let the world in.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM DOING THE BOOK TODAY: We learned from question one in the discussion that we’ve been very blessed to have so many great examples and mentors in our lives — people who took time to mentor us, be examples for us and bless us. It is essential that we do the same for others.
IF you haven’t ordered your book, you can get it by clicking here.
January 3rd â CHAPTER 3
“Keep Your Vows”
REMINDER: We’re putting pictures of our notes from our book on our story on both Instagram and Facebook
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 3 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: We underlined verses 3-7, 17-18, 27-33.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM PROVERBS 3: We loved exercise #4 in the discussion of underlining all the benefits of wisdom in those verses. They tied in exactly to #3 in the discussion where we listed five ways we have been blessed in our marriage and family.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM DOING THE BOOK TODAY: The story of the old man was one we heard years ago. While he experienced heartache for love, it was 100% worth it. We also learned from discussion question #1 that God’s ways are much better than our ways.
January 2nd – CHAPTER 2
“Pray for Wisdom”
REMINDER: Pictures of our notes from our book are on our story on Instagram and Facebook.
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 2 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: We underlined verses 2-4, 7-9, and verse 11.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM PROVERBS 2: We loved verse 2 about tuning your ears to hear wisdom. In a big crowd, with lots of noise, parents can hear their child call out to them because their ears are tuned to their voice. Solomon here tells us to turn our ears to hear wisdom. In the loud world, in the busy day and among the chaos of life, tune your ear to hear God.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM DOING THE BOOK TODAY: Gaining wisdom comes in many ways: 1) Listening to wise people. 2) Asking God for it. 3) Educating ourselves on God’s word.
We also learned that wisdom doesn’t just show up or happen by accident … you MUST be intentional about becoming wise.
In the first question on the discussion page, wisdom will protect you from people (both men and women) who are out to do you harm physically and spiritually.
We are excited about doing day two tomorrow. IF you haven’t ordered your book, you can get it by clicking here.
January 1st – CHAPTER 1
“There is Always More To Learn”
Today we kicked off day one of our journey through Proverbs. We began by reading chapter 1 of Proverbs. In our book, “Wisdom for your Marriage” we did the introduction and chapter 1. Pictures of our notes our on our story on Instagram and Facebook.
THINGS WE UNDERLINED IN CHAPTER 1 THAT STOOD OUT TO US: Verses 2 & 3; 20-26
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM PROVERBS 1: Verse 20-26: Tough verses here. Wisdom is there to teach us God’s ways. It’s not hard to find or know what He wants. It’s not a secret. Listen and learn, and you will be blessed in life, BUT ignore wisdom and it will do you no good when you reap the foolishness (not God’s ways) that you have sown.
THINGS WE LEARNED FROM DOING THE BOOK: We were reminded of one another’s likes and dislikes by answering the questions in the exercise called “there is always more to learn about your spouse.” Trey was reminded that Lea’s “perfect day” is pretty much hanging at home with nothing on the schedule. Lea was reminded that recharging to Trey involves “doing something” and not just being still.
We also learned that we need to be better listeners when one another is talking. Make eye contact and don’t try to multitask while the other is talking.
We are excited about doing day two tomorrow. IF you haven’t ordered your book, you can get it by clicking here.
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The 12 DATES of Christmas
Here’s the whole list for the 12 Dates of Christmas that we are doing on social media.
Since we are spending more time at home during the pandemic of 2020, we decided to come up with our own version of the 12 days of Christmas in the form of at-home dates based on the theme of each day of the familiar song. Most of these dates are family friendly, if you want to get the kids involved part of the time.
Date #1
A Partridge in a Pear Tree
For our 1st date, we made homemade pear cider by searching out a recipe on Pinterest. It was delicious and smelled like heavenly Christmas while it simmered on the stovetop. We decorated our Christmas tree while sipping our cider. We concluded our date by watching an episode of The Partridge Family on YouTube. Talk about a blast from the past! Television has come a long way in fifty years! J
If youâd like to throw gifts into the mix, here are some ideas:
– Potted miniature pine tree
– Pear scented candle or lotion
– Pear jelly
Date #2
Two Turtle Doves
For our 2nd date, I put together a basket of Dove body wash, a bath pouf, and Dove chocolates. We watched Home Alone 2: Lost in New York. Itâs one of our Christmas favorites, and it explains the significance of the turtle doves. Then we took a hot, relaxing bubble bath together, complete with the chocolates. đ
Date #3
Three French Hens
For our 3rd date, we had a simple dinner of chicken salad on brioche bread (any kind of French bread will do.) We topped it off with a dessert of French vanilla ice cream. I thought it would be fun to play a French card game, but after attempting to read through the rules of Piquet, we decided to stick to one of our favorites and play a game of Rummy. đ
Gift ideas:
– French press coffee maker
– Little Red Hen book
Date #4
Four Calling Birds
For this date, we got away from the birds, and went with the theme of calling. We spent our date calling on others. This would be a fun time to video chat with friends or family that you might not get to see this Christmas. We called our parents to check on them, and we also checked on a few friends who are sick or in quarantine to see if we could pick up anything for them at the store. We wrote Christmas cards to some of our older friends who live in care centers, and we delivered a few Christmas gifts. It was a fun date of spreading some Christmas cheer to others.
Gift ideas:
– Phone accessories like a new case,
– Extra long charging cord
– A portable battery backup
Date #5
Five Golden Rings
On our 5th date, we headed to our local Sonic drive-in and ordered burgers with a side of golden fried onion rings. We then cruised through our city park to look at the pretty display of lights.
Gift ideas:
– Ring Pop candy rings
– Silicone wedding bands
– Gold hoop earrings
– Bangle bracelets
– An actual ring!
Date #6
Six Geese a-Laying
Since this date fell on a Saturday for us, it was the perfect day for breakfast in bed, and day six is all about the food! We made egg omelets with our favorite toppings and homemade eggnog (fixed the night before) and climbed back under the covers.
(For a family activity, playing Duck, Duck, Goose would be fun, if you have small children.)
Gift ideas:
– Egg slicer
– Microwave egg poacher & cooker
– Goose down pillow or throw
Date #7
Seven Swans a-Swimming
Weâve been looking forward to this one: the fancy, dress-up date! Even though we stayed at home, we dressed up for one another. Trey grilled steaks while I fixed sides and set a pretty candle lit table. Then we cozied up by the fireplace to watch Disneyâs âNutcracker and the Four Realmsâ. We chose this film because itâs full of swan imagery. You can opt for Tchaicovskyâs original Nutcracker ballet or even Swan Lake.
Gift ideas:
– A Spa day
– Pool float
– Bath robe or bath pillow
– The Ugly Duckling or Little Swan books
Day #8
Eight Maids a-Milking
Date number eight was fairly simple. I bought a gallon of chocolate milk and marshmallows, heated it up in large mugs, and settled in by the fireplace for another movie. We intended to watch Maid in Manhattan starring Jennifer Lopez, but we opted for a Hallmark Christmas movie at the last minute. J
Gift ideas:
– Milk Duds candy
– Carton of milk and favorite box of cereal
– Milk frother
– Gift certificate to a Merry Maids cleaning service or homemade coupons to do a chore for each other
Date #9
Nine Ladies Dancing
Have fun with date number nine! We cleared a space in our living room, looked up instructions on how to Salsa dance on YouTube, and followed along. Believe me, since we both have two left feet, it was a date full of laughter for sure! If two-stepping is more your thing, turn on some country tunes and dance the night away. Other ideas for this theme are playing the Just Dance video game or watching a movie like Footloose or Dirty Dancing.
Gift ideas:
– Tickets to the Nutcracker ballet
– Ballet slippers Christmas ornament
– A tin of Pirouette cookie wafers
– A playlist of favorite songs
Date #10
Ten Lords a-Leaping
This date consisted of a home workout involving lots of jumping-jacks, jumping rope, jump squats and burpees, followed by a nice brisk walk around our local park.
Gift ideas:
– Jump ropes
– Gift certificate to a trampoline park
– Lord of the Dance DVD
– Lord of the Rings book or DVD
– Lord of the Flies book
Date #11
Eleven Pipers Piping
We didnât pipe on a flute, but we did pipe on some icing during this date. We spent the evening baking and decorating cookies while listening to Christmas music.
Gift ideas:
– Toy flute
– A set of cookie decorating supplies or cookie cutters
Date #12
Twelve Drummers Drumming
We fixed a dinner of BBQ chicken drumsticks and had Drumstick ice cream for dessert. For our dinner music, we listened to a classic rock playlist of twelve songs featuring drum solos. (You could also try Caribbean Christmas Tunes played on steel drums.) After dinner, we watched the animated Christmas classic, Little Drummer Boy.
Gift ideas:
– Toy Drum
– Tickets to see a favorite band
Our playlist would include:
In the Air Tonight â Phil Collins
Godzilla â Blue Oyster Cult
Take the Money and Run â Steve Miller Band
Space Cowboy â Steve Miller Band
Funk #49
You can find more drum solo songs here:
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